Good day hashers!

Do you have dreams of getting stuck in extreme shiggy? Does walking on sidewalks and pavement make your feet sad? Are you shortcutting across people’s yards and through alleys to get to your house/school/the bar sooner? Do you go home and hit yourself in the face with tree branches to recall that just-hashed feeling?

Who: Oh, Oh, Oh 1, Biblio, and Down on Your Knees
What: First "Virgin" Live Hare
Where: RCA Park, 1400 West Rca Park Drive, Bloomington, Indiana
When: 3pm

On-After:

Will be hosted by Oh, Oh, Oh 1 and Knees at 4336 Cricket Knoll, Bloomington. With ample beer, food will be catered by Mother Shucker and Biblio! Spread will feature fine tomato sauce casserole aka pissonya, antipasto salad, garlic bread, veggies, and mystery boozy desserts.

So just about everyone who attended Weird Al's first attempt at haring thought it was crap. He insists it was his co-hare's fault (as is right and proper custom), but we all know better. So Weird Al went into the shiggy and prayed, and found G, and was given a second chance. Your hares will be live-haring a short 'n' shitty trail to a keg of that sweet, sweet nectar of the gods (beer!).

Who: Mothershucker and Weird Al Spankabitch
Where: Jake's Nightclub and Bar (where else?), 419 N. Walnut, Bloomington
When: 7:00pm, Tuesday
Why: Yet another Fool Moon
What: You must be new here.

So last time Tite tried to hare in Cascades she got people lost and 6
hashers said screw this and did jello shots at Jizz's house. So lets try
this again - this time with a virgin hare and Jizz (he can't get lost on
his own trail, can he?) ...

Sounds like every other hash but... between three different kinds of fake
doctors, one of whom has, ummm… questionable organizational abilities,
another whose only sense of direction is, at best, bassackwards, and
another who has no experience in doing this at all, we (well, YOU) will be
lucky to survive this trail!

New Year's is a time for renewal, refreshing, and just a time to start over.

So bring your resolutions out to the Poplars Garage on Sunday to put it
all to the test.

Your wild hares have come up with a plan to challenge your New Year's
plans with the New Year's Revolution Hash.

Dr. Grumpy and Mother Shucker are going to run (or walk) you through
each of the seven deadly sins (and hopefully a few more!) to ruin your
resolutions and put your mind at ease for the rest of 2012. Don't
worry about change - we like you the drunken, half-minded way you are - just keep drinking!

The last hash of the year should be the hardest of all! However, my plans for ViagraHash shriveled when Titwad told me how expensive the stuff was (zing of the day!). So instead we're going to have to make the best of what you wankers already have. So, I give unto you "The Morning Wood Hash". In case you're too female to get wood first thing in the morning, we'll go to Paynetown SRA so we'll have plenty of proxy wood available.

I expect, nay demand, plenty of pictures using fallen logs as suggestive (or explicit if that's your thing) props!

‘Did you ever taste beer?’
‘I had a sip of it once,’ said the small servant.

‘Here's a state of things!’ cried Mr Swiveller, raising his eyes to
the ceiling. ‘She never tasted it--it can't be tasted in a sip!’
--- Charles Dickens, The Old Curiosity Shop

On the first day of hashing, my true love gave to me…mistletoe? Who said mistletoe?

Yes, all you Rude-dolphs and Ho Ho Ho’s, it’s that time of year again…time for the 15th annual Blooming Fools Jingle Ball Hash, coming up on Saturday, December 10, starting at 2 pm from the Wells Shelter in Morgan-Monroe State Forest! Come out and celebrate the holidays with all the other Frosty-fappers on a trail so shiggified not even the Who’s down in Who-ville can get through it!

'Twas the night before Jingle Balls, and all of the pack
were at Jake's for Hash Practice, to knock a few back.
Their whistles were hung ‘round their necks with flair
in hopes there’d be a hash while they were still there

The harriers were decked out in knee socks galore
some said "BFH3" while others said "WHORE"
And one hare with her flour, and the other with his own
triple-checked their plan while the sun barely still shone

The hounds stood around just knocking back drinks
because fifteen minutes waiting while sober just stinks

Once again it's time for the Bloomingfool's Pilgrims and Injuns Hash.
What are we hashing for? The chance to celebrate the Injuns not
killing us when they had the chance. and beer.

Dr. Grumpy and Oral Sax will be your lazy, half-prepared hares (which
is probably an improvement).

So dress up as a pilgrim (and chase the Injuns), or as a Injun
(feathers OR dots) and drink fire-water and make trinkets. Or dress up
as the great pumpkin, a turkey, or the Easter Bunny. And chase the
hares and drink beer.

Meat at the parking lot of Templeton Elementary, on the corner of Stull